It wasn’t my time

There have been many occasions over the past few years where I have questioned why I am, where I am. Is it because Lady Luck was on my side at that moment in my life? Or was it because, it wasn’t my time.

I keep thinking to myself, my life should have ended on the road that sunny morning. But it didn’t. And I can’t understand why.

It’s not that I’m not grateful that I’m alive. Every day there is something that reminds me of that morning. Sometimes it’s pain, other times it’s when I drop items or can’t pick them up. When I struggle to hold a pick as I play the guitar.

Then there are times when a program on TV brings back memories that should be shelved and not be allowed to see the light of day again. But those memories will only fade, and never leave. Engrained in my mind, forever.

We all need to face our demons at one point or another. Now is a good a time as any. Moving on is easier said than done, and if we don’t, all we are doing is fooling ourselves that everything is OK when deep down we know it’s not.

Second chances are made to be taken, do so when they land in your lap… Its high time I took mine.

Want Versus Need

We all have things we need to live our lives in a comfortable way. A roof over our heads. A few healthy, and sometimes not so healthy meals and a place to work where we can do our job and have a laugh with a few mates throughout the day.

But what about things we want. I mean really want! The things money can buy and we know its more of a luxury than a necessity. And deep down we know we can truly get by without, but we want it.

No matter who we are, we all have a few items we think we need, but are more of a want than anything else. Want versus need is situation that crops up and we need to make a choice. And that choice is not always as simple as it seems.

Do we stop ourselves from going out and buying a certain item or do we go without, even if we have the cash to splash and we will be happier for the purchase.

I know from personal experience i have wanted items that i could do without, but went off for some retail therapy, and felt better for the experience.

Then there are things that no amount of money can buy. Love and romance can’t be bought over the counter at the local store. Sex can be bought, but not love. Money is important so we can get on with our lives, but on its own, it won’t make us truly happy.

We need to think about what really makes us happy. Sometimes possessions bring a smile to our faces. But love is what truly makes the heart flutter and skip a beat as well as make turning that frown upside down.

As the Beatles told us:

I don’t care too much for money
Money can’t buy me love.

Born to sing the blues

Some people are born to win, some are born to lose, some are born to sing the blues.

Even though we may be born to win or lose, if we try hard enough, we can win, more than we lose. But is life all just about winning?

There are many times where second prize is good enough. It means we have had a crack at something, and that in itself is a huge accomplishment. We need to understand that not winning doesn’t make us losers, it makes us people who try, no matter the outcome.

Getting out of bed every morning is a win for many people who suffer some type of depression. But they put one foot in front of the other and get on with their daily lives. Not showing any signs of what they really feel deep inside.

Most people won’t show a single sign that they are depressed while out in public, or even when they are with family and friends. But once alone, its a different story.

Always keep an eye on your friends, be there for them, in the good times, and the bad. And as the days go by, there will be less and less bad days.

Little White Lies

No matter who we are, there is no doubt we have told a little white lie or two, or perhaps a few more. Some of them have been to not get busted after doing something wrong, while others may have been not to hurt other people’s feelings. Either way, we have been able to justify those lies to ourselves. Right or wrong.

The thing about the little white lies is that they eventually catch up and end up biting you on the arse. Sometimes leaving deep fang marks.

No matter what we think at the time, in the end the truth is the best way forward, even if there is some pain and heartache for the person who would have been lied to.

Then there is the fact of living in the lie, losing sleep and wanting it to end. It goes round in a neverending loop, getting deeeper and deeper with what seems no way out.

Even if we think we are doing the right thing and continue the lie so not to hurt someone who is close to us, it is better to tell the truth. There is a very good chance they will understand and life can go on.

If the lie cuts deep, the end result may not be what you really want, but its for the best for all involved and may be what we need to move forward with our lives.

Is it truly easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission?

TLC

With everything in our lives, we need to make sure it gets all the TLC it needs to continue to stand on its own two feet, or to keep growing as it should. This means we need to take care of all the things in our lives, human, animal or even structural.

As I visited a good friend not long ago, I looked out of his backyard and saw the house behind him in was in a state of complete disrepair. It had been neglected for many years was in desperate need of some TLC. In fact, it could do with a complete overhaul. A fresh lick of paint was not going to do much to the property. A lick of paint would have the very same effect as putting lipstick on a pig.

On the off chance someone decided to put in the effort and give the place the TLC it needed, there is a very good possibility it could be restored back to it’s original state, and perhaps continue to be what it was first built to be. A home sweet home. A place where a family belonged and shared many memories together.

Some TLC goes a long way, not just on run down properties. It can make a person who is down in the dumps look up and smile and see the world in a completely different light, knowing that a person they care for feels the same way about them, and are willing to put in the effort to get them back to a happy state of mind.

TLC can be as simple as an acknowledging smile, a tender touch or even a few kind words of encouragement. In today’s technology based society, a simple text message would suffice. It doesn’t have to be an earth shattering gesture, but one that will make a difference. A huge difference.

There are many ways to show some TLC, spoken or unspoken. But in the end, that TLC needs to come from the heart, and it’s not just a gesture of show. If it’s just for show, it means diddly squat.

Take a chance on someone and give them some tender loving care, you may be surprised at what you receive in return.

Be your own champion

While watching a documentary on the band Queen, they spoke about the songs, “We will rock you” and “We are the champions”. Both songs are now used at the end of major sporting events. There will only be one champion. One winner.

But in life, this is not always the case. Being number 1 is not something we all strive for in our lives. It’s not that we want to be at the bottom of the barrel, but we don’t feel the need to prove ourselves to anyone else.

The only person we need to better is ourselves. In sports, or at work, I do my best and that’s what gets me out of bed every morning. On the bike I chase down my PBs and strive to break one every time I get on the track. At work, it’s the same, I strive to do better than I did the day before. Sometimes easier said than done.

The only way to be a winner in life is to be honest with oneself. If we can do this on a daily basis we will continue to move in the right direction. It’s the moment we begin to lie to ourselves that everything is OK, then we head down the rabbit hole and never find our way out.

If we want to be a champion, we need to look deep into our own lives and not try to work out anyone else’s life. Our own life is complicated enough without delving into another’s life.

It’s high time to delve into what we really want, and what will make us a champion of our own life. Don’t wait another moment as tomorrow may never come.

Life choices

From the moment we wake up from our deep slumber, to the time we crawl back into our well made bed after a long day, we are forced to make multiple choices.

Some of these daily choices are as simple as what to have for breakfast. And for most people this choice is rather simple. Breakfast can be toast, cereal or just coffee. Personally, I get by with coffee until lunchtime, so I have one less choice to make. Then there is the tougher choice. What do we wear for the day? Jeans and tshirt work for me most days, but that’s not for everyone.

But these choices, as tough as we think they are, pale in comparison to some other choices we are faced with, and the descion we make can impact our lives, and the lives of people around us.

So as I sit here in the hospital waiting room once again in preparation for another operation, I need to make a very tough choice once I have fully recovered. Do I go back to road cycling and possibly be collected by another car, and this time, not live to tell that tale. Or do I stay on the bike path tracks and trails?

I keep getting told how truly lucky i am that I lived through a cycling accident involving a car and my carbon fiber road bike. I guess luck did play a part, and there was also lots of bad luck. But that’s in the past and I try not to dwell on it. Well, at least most of the time I don’t.

Once I recover from this operation, I need to think long abd hard if I will continue road cycling, or head back to riding tracks and trails to stay away from cars. Trucks and buses.

I know many people will say the choice is simple, get off the roads as it’s so much safer. Yes, in some ways it is, less cars and trucks and no angry cyclist hating motorists to hurl abuse and other objects at me as I ride past them.

But riding tracks and trails takes away part of the freedom road cycling offers. If I wanted to head north at a set of lights I could, or I could go whichever way I felt like heading.

On a bike trail, the options are fewer, so part of the freedom is taken away. Not that i can’t use different paths to ride on, it just takes away the one thing road bike had always offered me. Complete freedom.

In the past few months I have ridden some glorious tracks and trails. Some were easy, and in the last week i have discovered some tracks that have left me gasping for breath half way up. That’s all part of cycling.

After the operation I will have time to contemplate my future cycling routes. But right now, that seems like an eternity away.