I’m only human. Flesh and blood

No matter the color of our skin, we are all the same. We are all flesh and blood, skin and bones, muscle and tissue. So in reality, this means we are all prone to the same injuries and illnesses. And is saying that, we are all going to die at some point.

So it doesn’t matter whether we are black or white, or any shade in between, there is good and bad in everyone of us, and the hope that good outshines the bad is something we all want. But in saying this, there are people out there that only want to cause harm and pain to others around them. Some intentional, and other pain, very unintentional. But pain nonetheless.

With knowing that the colour of our skin has no direct impact on what we do in our lives, we are all prone to screwing up and doing one thing that will weigh heavily on our minds. Sometimes for a short while after, or other times that screw-up will stay with us for the remainder of our living years, until we take our last breath. We all make mistakes as our mental programming is similar. None of us can claim to be perfect. No matter what we think of ourselves.

Now knowing we are all programmed in the same way and should be able to forgive others of their discretions. which we do at some point. We also know that the people around us screw up, and we normally manage to forgive them for what they have done. Sometimes the pain takes longer to fade, but it does. And in the end we can forgive. Even if the memory stays firmly lodged in the back of of minds.

So, if we can eventually forgive others for the things they do and say that cause us pain, why can’t we forgive ourselves for the things we do to others? The ones we somehow hurt can eventually forgive us, but we cant let go of what we have done and are unable to cut ourselves some slack and let the past be exactly that. The past.

But sometimes it’s easier said than done. We continue turning over our ‘bad’ deeds in our minds, and don’t let them fade into the deepest part of our memory banks. Not that we should ever forget our mistakes, but they should not control our lives from the moment the mistake was made, until the moment we die.

When we reach the point in our lives where we know we need to let go of a memory, what can we do? We can’t just erase the memory, like they do with memories in the movie Total Recall. If we don’t like the current memories we have, we simply can’t have another one implemented. As good as an idea as that sounds, it’s not going to happen. At least not in my lifetime.

So what do we do? We can ask for forgiveness, but that may have already been given. In the end, we are the only ones who can let go of the memories that are weighing us down. These memories are the ones that are possibly causing more stress, pain and bitterness to others than the actual ‘bad’ deed itself.

Kindness and understanding from the people around us will make a difference. It may take time, but time is all we have.

I’m only human. Flesh and blood

No matter the color of our skin, we are all the same. We are all flesh and blood, skin and bones, muscle and tissue. So in reality, this means we are all prone to the same injuries and illnesses. And is saying that, we are all going to die at some point.

So it doesn’t matter whether we are black or white, or any shade in between, there is good and bad in everyone of us, and the hope that good outshines the bad is something we all want. But in saying this, there are people out there that only want to cause harm and pain to others around them. Some intentional, and other pain, very unintentional. But pain nonetheless.

With knowing that the colour of our skin has no direct impact on what we do in our lives, we are all prone to screwing up and doing one thing that will weigh heavily on our minds. Sometimes for a short while after, or other times that screw-up will stay with us for the remainder of our living years, until we take our last breath. We all make mistakes as our mental programming is similar. None of us can claim to be perfect. No matter what we think of ourselves.

Now knowing we are all programmed in the same way and should be able to forgive others of their discretions. which we do at some point. We also know that the people around us screw up, and we normally manage to forgive them for what they have done. Sometimes the pain takes longer to fade, but it does. And in the end we can forgive. Even if the memory stays firmly lodged in the back of of minds.

So, if we can eventually forgive others for the things they do and say that cause us pain, why can’t we forgive ourselves for the things we do to others? The ones we somehow hurt can eventually forgive us, but we cant let go of what we have done and are unable to cut ourselves some slack and let the past be exactly that. The past.

But sometimes it’s easier said than done. We continue turning over our ‘bad’ deeds in our minds, and don’t let them fade into the deepest part of our memory banks. Not that we should ever forget our mistakes, but they should not control our lives from the moment the mistake was made, until the moment we die.

When we reach the point in our lives where we know we need to let go of a memory, what can we do? We can’t just erase the memory, like they do with memories in the movie Total Recall. If we don’t like the current memories we have, we simply can’t have another one implemented. As good as an idea as that sounds, it’s not going to happen. At least not in my lifetime.

So what do we do? We can ask for forgiveness, but that may have already been given. In the end, we are the only ones who can let go of the memories that are weighing us down. These memories are the ones that are possibly causing more stress, pain and bitterness to others than the actual ‘bad’ deed itself.

Kindness and understanding from the people around us will make a difference. It may take time, but time is all we have.

What do we really want?


When we are youngsters, we somehow seem to know exactly what we want. We know what possessions we want, what friends we want and what pets we want in our homes and our lives

We are so focused we also know what job we want when we grow up. Young boys will want to be a police officer, a fireman, an astronaut or possibly a doctor. As for the young girls, I can only guess they dream of being a teacher, a nurse or perhaps a scientist.

But as we grow older and supposedly wiser after attending school and possibly college, we are out with all the other grownups and may not think that the degree we completed is the career path we want to head down.

In the end, we eventually settle down into a job that does more than pay the bills. It gets us out of the house on a daily basis and makes us productive, no matter what we end up doing.

So, in reality we should be happy. But are we? Having a job and getting paid is a very good thing. Going to work is also a fantastic place to socialise. We make workmates who sometimes become more than that.

Many people head out for drinks and dinner with work colleagues on a Friday night. And then there are the ones who go that one step further and date, and sometimes marry someone they work with.

But in the end, are we truly happy with what we have achieved in our lives?

No one can take away our achievements, so we are the only ones who think we have never done enough. We put ourselves down and think we could have gone that one step better. In sports, work and life.

So this is where we need to give ourselves a pat on the back. We have not only survived, but we have achieved more than what we really know.

Don’t stop believing in yourself, because once you do, the downwards spiral is not far away.

It takes guts – to leave the ruts

As time progresses, all of us become very comfortable in the way we do things, the way we live and the situations we end up putting up with for much longer than we really should.

I understand this is human nature and once we are in a comfortable rut, we don’t make a huge effort to change the situation. If any effort at all. Even though we know there is something better and another way to move forward in our lives and not be stuck in the same place just spinning our wheels and not going anywhere.

I have discovered that even the simplest of things in life become second nature to us. But what has really happened is that a rut has set in. It’s something that slowly happens over time and we don’t realize until it’s either pointed out to us or the realisation hits us like a ton of bricks.

It can be as simple as taking the same running route every time you head out for a walk or a run. I have noticed that with my walks and runs. I now take the same route when I head out in my running gear.

Not that the path I take is any easier than others in my area, I know that turning left at the first street would be less hilly for the first few kilometres and then I would get the hills, rather than struggle with hills at the start of the run. I would still be covering the same distance, but I would have some slightly different scenery as I puff and pant my way through the run.

The same applies when I head out on my road bike. I can go anywhere I want and end up in so many wonderful locations and see sights I have never seen before whilst out cycling. The world is truly my oyster. But after checking my Strava account, it really seems that I am a true creature of habit.

I have logged hundreds and hundreds of rides over the years, but a majority of them seem to take a very similar path. There may be a slight detour here and there, but the end destination is the same for more than 95% of my rides. Boring perhaps?

It’s not that I don’t have an adventurous streak in me, I know that’s there and has been proven on many occasions, some occasions more stupid than others, but it’s there, waiting to be set free on a regular basis.

Then there is the daily grind which can easily become a rut as we don’t make an effort for ourselves and for our family and partners. The people who mean the most to us also become a rut. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Getting out of a rut that has well and truly set in takes effort. Sometimes a lot of effort. It’s not going to happen on its own. We need to make a conscious effort and get off our butts and take the first step to leave the rut behind.

That one first step becomes two steps. Two steps become four. And before we know it, the rut we were in so far behind us we can’t see it anymore.

As simple as it sounds, it will take effort. If the rut that has set in involves more than one person and has just about been set in stone, effort and patience is required. By the truck load.

In the end, we are the only ones who can pull ourselves out of a rut that is holding us back from achieving greatness.

We owe it to ourselves to to keep moving forward and leave the ruts behind.

It’s not giving up when you know you have lost

The saying goes ‘When the going gets tough, the tough get going’. But what happens when you know what you’re after is so far out of reach, that not even a miracle will get you over the line for a win.

What does happens is you understand that not everything is able to be achieved and you need to make the hard call of whether you continue moving forward in a direction where failure is the only outcome.

And while you continue to forge forward, thinking you can win, what are you really achieving? More pain, heartache and unforgettable suffering?

Is it time to cut your losses and accept that this is the one you are going to lose?

At the end of the day, some you win, some you don’t. So I’m glad that I’m here with friends I know, who will always have a smile for me.

Regrets


As I sat down and had a coffee with my parents recently, my Mother said something I would have never expected to hear from her.

She started talking about the things she would have liked to have done when she and my Dad were younger.

Going back to Italy was one thing she would have liked to have done more often, but there was always something stopping her from getting on a plane and visiting her family. They didn’t make the time and put in the effort that was needed to head back home.

It seems we all have regrets of sorts. Sometimes it’s what we have done or said, and then there are times when we wished we hadn’t done or expressed our feelings to the ones closest to us in our lives.


But no matter which situation we have gone through, we will always have some regrets. There is no magic pill to help us out with our regrets, we need to deal with them head on.

If it’s something we have said, we can always apologise. And if it’s something we have done and have hurt others, do something for them that shows you do care and try to move forward.

Then there are the regrets that linger over us like a dark cloud. They are the ones we need to work on the most.

But as we get older we learn and grow, but that doesn’t mean we have to regret what we did before we learned how to do things differently. If we didn’t go through those experiences, we might not have grown into the strong and knowledgeable people we are today.

Without regrets it may mean we may not be in the place we are now. For better or worse.

Regrets

As I sat down and had a coffee with my parents recently, my Mother said something I would have never expected to hear from her.

She started talking about the things she would have liked to have done when she and my Dad were younger.

Going back to Italy was one thing she would have liked to have done more often, but there was always something stopping her from getting on a plane and visiting her family. They didn’t make the time and put in the effort that was needed to head back home.

It seems we all have regrets of sorts. Sometimes it’s what we have done or said, and then there are times when we wished we hadn’t done or expressed our feelings to the ones closest to us in our lives.

But no matter which situation we have gone through, we will always have some regrets. There is no magic pill to help us out with our regrets, we need to deal with them head on.

If it’s something we have said, we can always apologise. And if it’s something we have done and have hurt others, do something for them that shows you do care and try to move forward.

Then there are the regrets that linger over us like a dark cloud. They are the ones we need to work on the most.

But as we get older we learn and grow, but that doesn’t mean we have to regret what we did before we learned how to do things differently. If we didn’t go through those experiences, we might not have grown into the strong and knowledgeable people we are today.

Without regrets it may mean we may not be in the place we are now. For better or worse.