Laughter

Expiry Date

Posted on by fantomwriter


Every time we open the fridge or take a look in our pantry, we find items that are close to or past their expiry date. Milk, yoghurt, pasta and even sugar laced cereal has an expiry date.


All these items hit their end of life date before we had time to make the most of what they had to offer us. We let the opportunity slip through our fingers and then realise we should have made the most of the item before it hit its time was over.

But, as with all food items we can venture down to the local supermarket and replenish the old expired stock with some fresh items. And then we are able to sit down to a breakfast of milk and cereal. Hopefully Coco Pops.


Even after restocking the pantry and fridge with fresh items, there is one item with an expiry date that we should all be concerned about. Our very own end of life. Once we hit our expiry date, there is no trip to the supermarket that will help us in anyway.

So with that expiry period at the forefront of my mind of late, I’ve realised that even the simplest things in life can be the most enjoyable. From sipping a latte at my favourite coffee shop or taking a hike through the hilly terrain of some local tracks.


We never know what tomorrow brings, so when we we wake up every morning we should take every single opportunity to make the most of our lives.

Spending time with family, friends and loved ones is never going to be a waste of their time or yours. It will make our time before our expiry date so much more pleasurable and bring a smile to our faces.


Now that I have the opportunity to look back, I realise my end of life date could have easily been 18 March 2017. But I was fortunate enough to see another day.

And with that second opportunity I want to get out and about and do things that will make me smile and understand there is happiness to be found.


If that involves getting on a plane and travelling the globe or one day getting back on the bike and cycling around to areas I never got to do beforehand, then I will be making the most of second opportunity.


Be sure you make the most before your expiry date us reached.

What’s in a name?

Posted on by fantomwriter

bond-full

Why is it that so many people insist on wearing their name badges from the seminar they are attending out onto the street for one and all to see? The only valid reason that springs to mind is that these people are in desperate need of a date and would like to be asked out for a coffee or lunch. Better still, perhaps a night out on the town and then a raunchy weekend for two.

But that is more than likely my imagination running rampant once again. It is more likely that they are too lazy to remove their badges and pin them back on once they return to the seminar.

One such badge caught my attention one day as I wandered the city streets in search of nothing in particular. It was when I stopped at a set of traffic lights and I caught sight of the very large badge pinned to his multi-striped shirt. Actually, it wasn’t the badge that really caught my attention, but it was his name that made me smirk.

The badge read ‘Timmy Smelles’. Not that there is anything wrong with his name, but you would think that he wouldn’t try and live up to his surname.

Even though it was a warm day, I wouldn’t say it was what one would call sweating weather. But Timmy had different ideas. Not only was he sweating, he smelt as he had been sweating for more than a few minutes. Nothing that a stick of anti-perspirent wouldn’t fix, or at least go half way to making him smell a bit better.

Well, that’s my spin on the situation anyway.

On another note in regards to name tags, I only just found out that name tags should be pinned onto the right hand side of the body and not the left, where most people tend to pin them.

The logic behind this is clear and simple (once it has been explained). When someone introduces themselves, they shake with their right hand. The line of vision will automatically follow the arm and stop at their name tag, making it easier for identification.

I should thank the little lady of the house for that bit of information. I can’t take credit for everything. Now can I?

Are you listening?

Posted on by fantomwriter

During one of my train trips home, i settled back into a seat opposite an elderly couple, took out my iPhone and headphones and plugged in so I could listen to the sounds of the 80s once again and chill out after another long and frustrating day at the office.

Even though I had my music playing, it was on low enough to overhear the following  conversation between the elderly couple.

Wife: Hand me your phone.
Husband looks at her for a moment and hands phone over to his wife.

Wife plays on the phone for a few moments and then asks. Have you changed the password to the website?

Husband: Looking a little annoyed. No. I tried getting in and the password didn’t work so I tried to change it.

Wife: Shakes her head and sighs out loudly. So you changed it?

Husband: No. I tried and still couldn’t get in.

Wife: What did you change the password to?

Husband: Summer25

Wife: Now very agitated. So you changed it to Summer25?

Husband: No. I tried to change it but it failed.

Wife tries new password and it works.

Wife: You changed the password.

Husband: No. I tried to change the password.

Wife: The password is now Summer25

Husband: Looking a little confused. When did the password change?

Wife shakes her head and hands phone back.

Lies. Everyone Lies!

Posted on by fantomwriter

People lie.

Kids lie to their parents. Workers lie to their managers.

Partners lie to on another.

Everyone lies. It’s plain and simple.

This was quite obvious earlier this year as I was cycling along the peninsula with Action Man while we searched for the Legend so we could ride down to Sorrento together as a pack.

We stopped off on a corner, which just so happened to be the location of a cafe. And as per normal, there were a couple of cyclists sitting down and enjoying a well earned cafe latte.

As we started chatting, one of them lit up a cigarette and casually smoked as we continued our conversation. I finally asked the smoker how often he smoked. His response stumped me.

I only smoke when I go out cycling on the weekends. We do an easy 40 kms, find a cafe, have a couple of coffees as I have a few ciggies and then head home. My wife asks me every now and again if I smoke at work, which I don’t. So I tell her I don’t smoke.

So not sure how to respond, I left him and his Jive Talkin.  I said my farewells and headed back onto the road for another 70 kms with Action Man.

All in all the ride was great, and I did stop off for a coffee near the end of the journey. But no cigarette.

Jive Talking – The Bee Gees

No Lies – Noiseworks 

Train Amusement

Posted on by fantomwriter

Some people can amuse themselves just about anywhere it seems. And on a train is just another place to have a laugh.

As I headed home one evening on the ever efficient metro train system, I sat across from a guy who was watching a video on his iPhone. He had his earphones plugged in so not to disturb the other passengers.

I’m guessing it must have been a really good video, as every few minutes and he would snort out loud (SOL).

Not that this was a real concern, but the fact that he kept dipping his hand into a brown paper bag and pulling out munchies did make me wonder what else he would do on the train to keep himself amused.

I guess I will keep a lookout for him over the coming weeks.